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I'm a 30-something student affairs professional, technology enthusiast, and all-around geek. trdaisuke@trdaisuke.com

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2020-10-4: Frustration regarding mental block

Starting a gopher hole to try to write through a writer's block

2 min read

I created a hole at gopher://gopher.club:70/1/users/trdaisuke/
I'll be crossposting my posts here going forward.

This post originally hit the smolweb on 10 June 22 at gopher://sdf.org:70/0/users/trdaisuke/First.txt although as you will read it was originally written much earlier...

 

Originally written 4 October 2020.

10 June 2022 addendum: Yikes... for real? Have I really been just
thinking about making a gopher for 20 months? Well, at least I've finally
gotten around to putting it up.
----
Lately I've felt like I can't write anything more than a few sentences at
a time, so I thought I would set up a little gopher hole here to try to
get in the swing of writing again.

It's particularly devastating to me to have this mental block against
writing since I was a writer all through college and studied creative
writing as my major. Notice I didn't say "writer's block" - it's far
worse than that. Writer's block usually connotes a block against writing
in some project or work. But for me right now, it's practically
everything. Work emails, social media posts, even to-do lists seem to
paralyze me.

I can't figure out why or what caused this block. Is it as if once the 
word is written, I've lost control of it? I can't change it or take it
back? It's also possible it's a result of the turmoil in the world right
now. Maybe I'm so unsettled by what's going on out there that prevents me
from getting in a writing frame of mind. Or maybe it's my general
transformation from a creative person to a more conventionally-minded
person. Or frankly, it might be because I've gotten worse at focusing and
minimizing distractions.

In any case, I'm bothered by it, so I'll be trying this as a form of 
active practice. It has been some time since I've kept a written personal
journal. Maybe this will help me to get over this slump.

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